Daddy Issues: Fearing his children would depose him

Daddy Issues is a periodical about embracing, resenting and critically questioning what it means to be a father. It will attempt to account for the accomplishments and failures of a loving, contributing partnership in a human project. It will occasionally be insightful and/or funny (mostly in retrospect) due to its frightfully naive and oblivious author.


My best friend is going to give birth to our child in about a month or so. No, we’re not ready. I don’t think we can be. It’s not that I’m not excited about it it’s just that I’m caught wriggling beneath a massive Sisyphean boulder of anxiety when I think of the social, moral and economic gravity of raising another human being.

Do you realize that every human being on the planet is literally born from the sacrifice of a woman? Did you know that a fetus just holds all of the amniotic fluid, mucus and bile ingested in the uterus for when it’s born — and then passes it as a “vicious and sticky-like tar” in the first few hours and days after birth? Has anyone considered how this third person in our household will not pay rent for the next 18-ish years?

This is my current state of mind as a well-slept, well-nourished well-kept adult with hardly any real responsibility. “As long as we take turns freaking out, it’ll be okay,” is what we keep telling each other.


Aaron Russin  is probably not several children sitting on each other’s shoulders wrapped in a trench coat wearing a bowler cap. Follow them — I mean — *HIM* on twitter @aaronrussin.